More White Stuff?

Me and Gracie in the white stuff

A couple times recently, there has been this white cold stuff that falls from the sky. It isn’t nasty like rain, it is nice and fluffy and fun. I have no idea what it is, but I really like it! It is the most awesome thing I’ve ever seen in my whole 3.5 years I’ve been alive! Gracie and I wish we could get some more of it somewhere…

Let me tell you why I like the white stuff.

1. You can dig in it really easily. Even Gracie can dig a hole!
2. You can eat it. Anything edible is OK in my book.
3. It makes everything quiet, like putting your head under a cushion. There aren’t as many cars rumbling by, or as many people out walking and yelling down the street.
4. I can see where I pee.
5. My moms stay home and play with us all day!
6. Did I mention you can eat it?

Here’s why I don’t like it:

1. My mom makes me wear the stupid red coat.

Mom and me and the stupid red coat

I know, I look cute in the coat. But I look cute in anything (or naked), and I’m really very tough, so there’s no reason to make me wear the coat. It makes me walk funny. Plus, Djembe and Seven laugh at me when no one is looking. This is what Seven looks like when he’s laughing at me:

It isn't funny.

So here’s what I would like, humans. We have only had this white stuff twice. That is unacceptable. I would like to have white stuff once a week, or at least twice per month at a minimum. It must remain for 36 hours. This will give me enough time to make intricate pee designs before it melts. Also, I don’t want to wear the red coat. I will consent to a masculine leather jacket, but no fleece or sweaters.

If you can provide this, humans, I promise to never beg at the table, keep my cold nose to myself first thing in the morning, and get off your lap when I’m feeling gassy. Is it a deal?

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